Advice for young people

Dealing with bullying

Bullied girl, pointing

If you are being bullied, it is natural to wonder whether there is something wrong with you, or ask yourself the question, 'why me?'

A bully can make you feel alone, different and unlikeable. But trust the team at Kidscape when we say, this is not true.

Unfortunately, bullies just need to a find a person to target - someone they can harm either physically, verbally or emotionally. It is for this reason we refer to those being bullied as a 'target' rather than victim. We understand that bullying can be a terrible experience that feels like it will never end. However, the information you will find on Kidscape's website aims to give you the confidence to rise above the bullies and stop the cycle for good.  

Bullies need targets

So what do we mean by this? Basically, bullies are not usually fussy about who they pick on, they just need a target who they think will not stand up for themselves. They will use a 'difference' to make you believe that it is somehow your fault. But in our experience, this difference is just an excuse. You could change every day to suit the desire of the bully, but often they will just find something else to pick on.

Why do people bully?

Although it is not fair, people usually bully others because they feel bad about themselves. Their aggression is often an attempt to hide their own unhappiness. Most commonly people who bully feel:

  • rejected by somebody;
  • jealous about other people's talents and abilities;
  • different or inadequate;
  • overcome by stress or pressure.

Their behaviour can also be an indication of more serious problems. For example they may:

  • be being bullied themselves, either by another student or even a family member;
  • not have any positive role models to teach them right from wrong;
  • be exposed to others who see violence in a positive way;
  • be punished very unfairly at home.

Related advice 

Where can I get help?
How to respond to bullies
Dealing with cyber bullying

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